Parents and other dysthym stuff.

I'm really getting annoyed now. It's all wet and bloody around here :s I know Curry has it worse, and I really feel sorry for her, because she can't live home with her mother, but on the other side I'm jealous, because she can go away. I wish I had a place to run to... a place which I can call home. Where I can be alone, with people I can talk with. People I trust.

I'm walking in the rain, though everything seems to be hurting me for some reason. There is only nothing. Just kill me now ... as I roam forever.
Endless rain, fall on my heart In this wounded soul. Let me forget, all of the hate, all of the sadness

Like, I don't know it anymore. I just can't seem to understand them. Parents... why do they exist? Is it their ultimate goal to destroy the life's of the children? To make the children hate them, wishing the parents didn't exist? Or to make the children wish that they could commit suicide? I know the friends part, but parents make it hard to hang around with friends..

If it's all dreams, now wake me up If it' s all real just kill me...

I'll give you my hand, I will be there for you. But you must promise.. promise to hurt me. Like, me thinks Baba don't trust me anymore :( Not anyone can be trusted, anyway. Thinking about the past, the future, the everything. Maybe I must do what Johanna told me: Write about porn to make my anger go away. Maybe I can do that. Don't know yet.. don't know anything. Only that I'm going further with what I was doing before Johanna called me, and while I was calling with her.